A murder in Pampore and another in Budgam in a week in a society which is debating and discussing the morality, religious standing and acceptability of a girls’ band loudly portrays the growing insensitivity. The females were killed brutally by the people of their household. There is no Maulvi or state apparatus to blame here. We are responsible for all sorts of domestic violence which happens inside the four walls of our safe and secure homes. Let us at least try to look inwards for burning our women alive who didn’t bring enough material possession in form of sinister dowry to satisfy our greed.
Where does this greed of dowry end? A scooter yesterday, Maruti 800 today and a fancy Volkswagen tomorrow. Our society, no doubt, is another brick in the wall of materialism but the crudeness of this lust can drive people to burn their women is highly unacceptable and inhumane!
With a female child’s birth in a family, people of household are generally seen frowning, especially if it is another addition to the female children in a family. Out of the possible reasons for considering a female a burden is huge dowry which parents start accumulating from a female’s birth only. It is this foreseen burden which doesn’t let many families spend on girl’s education and it is this dowry only which is responsible for not letting women from poor socio-economic background in our society get married even at 40 years of age. Marriage as an institution has been made difficult majorly because of the huge financial component associated with it – gold, feast, pomp and show and then dowry!
With a myriad of acts in place to defend women’s rights; be it the prohibition of child marriage or sati of yesteryears or the act against domestic violence of the year 2000, why are our women still suffering? Why are they denied the basic human rights and what drives us insane enough to burn them, especially in conjugal relation which is considered the most close and intimate human relation by all world religions and cultures.
Being a majority Muslim state, we have an option of separating ways if a marriage doesn’t work because essentially in Shariah, marriage is a contract. Having said this, it need not be taken as a trade or bond but we need to understand that in legal terminology too, a contract takes place with consent of both the parties and can be dissolved by mutual consensus. This is the height of democracy which Islam allows even in personal relations. If an option of divorce is available, what drives us crazy enough to burn our women alive to get rid of them? Male ego, materialism, height of patriarchy, or the lowest of lows of the human psyche which a human can attain.
