by Raees ul Hamid Paul
Alhamdulillah! We are adherents of a beautiful religion. No other religion lays stress on moral values and upholding the chastity of men and women in such a lofty strain as does Islam. In one pertinent verse of the Quran, Allah SWT tells His Messenger, “Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and protect their private parts. This is purer for them. Indeed Allah is well aware of what they do”(Surah Nur: 30). So, it’s the menfolk first who are commanded not to leer at women and to protect their modesty.
The brutal rape and murder of Asiya and Neelofar continue to haunt us till today and the recent horrendous rape and killing of little Bakerwal girl in Kathua sent shock waves across the world and all of us condemned this abominable crime and demanded crucifixion of the rapists.
For quite a long time, I was living in denial mode, believing that harassment and molestation of our women do not exist in Kashmir I had this mistaken belief because we are a “conservative society”, an abode of saints (Pir vaier). The values and ethics we have inherited from our aslaaf, I believed, we are free from perverts and sociopaths who try to outrage the modesty of our sisters, daughters and mothers.
But that is no the reality. The women at their workplaces and during travel are the worst sufferers of sexual intimidation and the molesters often turn out to be “married” men and those at higher positions who sexually harass their female subordinates. These perverts and deviants feel emboldened due to their clout, arrogance and our apathy towards such incidents. Quite often the people around know about these incidents but choose to keep mum. The victim doesn’t reveal her ordeal out of fear of facing social stigma and societal shame. She takes it as a blemish on her character and deems that it can’t be wiped off. Time and again these sordid and agonizing memories come back to haunt her and she begins to search faults in herself and in her demeanour. Even if she chooses to disclose, she is met with callous treatment from the society by the victim- blaming her, her morality is questioned, asking her traumatic questions like whether she gave signals inviting abuse, etcetera.
We tend to forget that it’s we men first who were ordained by Allah SWT not to gawk at women, let alone trying to harm them. A woman even if she desires, will never make a sexual advance (both within and outside legitimate boundary); it’s ingrained in her shy nature, she will always step back, it’s the man who takes the lead. The perversion, therefore, lies in menfolk. The buck stops at menfolk who are creating this suffocating environment for our women. These perverts and morally deviant people are the scum of the society who must be isolated and name shamed. They are ripping apart our glorious cultural standing.
I get emotionally touched by this hadith of Prophet Muhammad SAW where He says to Adiy Ibn Hatem (RA), “By He in whose hands is my soul, verily Allah will bring this matter [Islam] into completion till women travel from Hira and circumambulate the Ka’ba without being accompanied by anyone.” In a slightly different narration, it’s mentioned that she won’t be afraid of anybody except Allah SWT.
Let’s at least work on this one aspect of that society which Muhammad PBUH had aspired and Himself built, in which our womenfolk feel safe, secure and breathe freely. Let’s not breach the trust and the faith our women repose in us. As believers of Islam, how can we go astray when we are led by the beautiful teachings of Prophet Muhammad? I wonder if moral values enshrined in our Shariah can’t deter us from committing these shameful things, then what else could. We may put in place anti-sexual harassment committees, but I believe if we imbibe moral values in ourselves, only then we can pre-empt such offences.
Touching upon the other issue is the latest bone-chilling incident in which reportedly a daughter of the soil, whose age has been contested so far, was accompanying Major Leetul Gogoi apparently to have an overnight stay with him. In the first place, we must laud the exemplary role of the Mamta Hotel management for keeping their business interests aside and rescuing the girl from getting sexually exploited.
Leave aside what action Army is going to take against its soldier, let’s do a bit soul-searching of ourselves as a society. The pimp (here too the accomplice in the crime is the son of the soil) apparently seems to have struck the deal between her and the Major and facilitated their meetings. As per the reports, the family of the girl is presently living in a makeshift shed made of galvanized corrugated steel sheets. It is being widely said that extreme poverty of her family had probably driven her to develop an illicit relationship with our adversary. But can the penurious condition of the family serve an excuse for somebody to go astray and sell her chastity? I would rather blame parents and society at large for such fragile moral character and complacent attitude of parents of not keeping an eye on the whereabouts of their children, not reining them and our inability to inculcate sound moral values in them.
Yesterday’s incident of rape of a minor girl in Budgam and surfacing of the murder of a property dealer from Nowgam by his wife in connivance with her paramour should send shivers down our spine. Isn’t that we should take these incidents as a matter of collective shame and an embarrassment to us that we get to see these shameful incidents even in this blessed month of Ramzan?
If we were up in arms against the brutal rape and murder of innocent little Bakerwal girl, why are we silent on these morally wayward people of our own community who are committing these shameful acts in our backyard, in our neighborhood, in our institutions, in our offices, in our schools and in our homes? We must ask this question to ourselves; are we heading towards a moral disaster? Why is there criminal silence and complacency towards this moral decadence? I believe these incidents were unheard of in our society. There is something wrong with our society. Why aren’t we getting jolted on these ghastly incidents?
Instead of spending time in propagating sectarian supremacy and doing manazirahs on whether eight or twenty rakats are authentic, why don’t our religious preachers and scholars vociferously stress on the manners, ethics and moral values?
(Author is a PhD scholar at PGI Chandigarh. Ideas expressed in the write-up are his own.)
