by Dr Mehnaz Rashid
On Women’s Day, the question of why women sometimes oppose other women is examined, arguing that patriarchal structures, not inherent rivalry, shape behaviour in workplaces, families, and society.
Every year on Women’s Day, we celebrate strength, resilience, and sisterhood. Social media is filled with inspiring stories, workplaces organise events, and speeches highlight women’s achievements. Yet, behind the slogans and celebrations lies an uncomfortable question we rarely pause to ask: why do women sometimes stand against other women?
In many spaces, subtle tensions appear where solidarity might be expected. In some workplaces, a female superior may consciously or unconsciously favour male colleagues over equally capable women. At home, a woman entering marriage may find resistance not from men alone but from another woman, perhaps a mother-in-law or sister-in-law, who once walked the same difficult path. The irony is difficult to ignore.
However, this phenomenon should not be understood as proof that women are inherently unsupportive of one another. Rather, it often reflects the deep influence of patriarchal systems that shape behaviour, expectations, and opportunities. Women, like men, grow up within social structures that reward competition, obedience, and conformity to traditional power hierarchies.
At the Workplace
In many professional environments, power structures remain largely male-dominated. Women who manage to rise within such systems often do so after navigating significant barriers. In some cases, this difficult journey can create pressure to align with existing power networks, networks that have historically been male-dominated.
Supporting other women may sometimes be perceived, consciously or unconsciously, as a risk. Collaboration may give way to competition when opportunities are limited and scrutiny is intense. Sociologists have described this dynamic in terms such as the “queen bee phenomenon,” where women in senior positions distance themselves from other women in order to maintain their own legitimacy within male-dominated structures.
This is rarely a deliberate act of exclusion. More often, it reflects the subtle ways in which institutions shape behaviour and reward conformity to existing norms.
Inside Homes
Within families, the dynamics can be even more complex. A mother-in-law who once lived under strict expectations, silence, and sacrifice may unconsciously reproduce the same patterns with the next generation. What she endured becomes what she expects others to endure.
Similarly, a sister-in-law may sometimes perceive another woman not as an ally but as a competitor for attention, authority, or emotional space within the household.
What we often witness in such situations is not simply cruelty or hostility. It is, more often, unhealed experiences passed down through generations, where tradition disguises unresolved pain.
The Real Enemy Is Not Each Other
When women stand against women, the underlying system remains unchanged. Patriarchy survives not only because men uphold it, but also because social norms gradually train women to internalise and reproduce it, often without conscious intention.
This is why true empowerment cannot simply mean replacing men in positions of authority. Real transformation occurs when the nature of power itself changes, when empathy replaces rivalry and collaboration replaces isolation.
Let Us Choose Solidarity
Women’s Day should not only be a moment of celebration; it should also be a moment of reflection. It should encourage us to ask difficult questions about how social systems shape our relationships with one another.
Perhaps the most meaningful way to honour this day is to remember that:
Another woman’s success does not diminish our own.
Empathy is not a weakness but a form of strength.
Supporting other women is not merely kindness; it is a quiet act of resistance.
The moment women begin to stand with women, either in offices, homes, or communities, the structures that depend on their division begin to weaken.
And perhaps that is the most powerful and radical way to celebrate Women’s Day.
(The author holds a PhD in Linguistics. Ideas are personal.)
